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Re: another baby advice
Posted:
17-Dec-2006 12:06
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I've said this so many times before, that I'm reluctant to say it again, but as our experience does seem to be quite a relevant one in making such a decision, I'll say it again. It hurts more every time I type it though.
I have two children with cf. My daughter is 4 1/2, and has stayed relatively well. She had Haemophilus Influenzae at 13 months, and Pseudomonas at 23 months, and that's it. Neither made her ill. Both were easily cleared, and she hasn't grown a bug in 2 1/2 years. She still struggles, she doesn't like physio, she has to take a lot of tablets, she has to have foul tasting vitamins and prophylactic antibiotics, and she still has problems adjusting mentally to her cf.
My son is 2 years 3 months, and he is the total opposite. He grew his 1st bug at 1 month old and didn't stop growing them for 8 months. He has needed 13 courses of iv's so far, and has had 2 portacath surgeries. He also has severe asthma and gastro-oesophageal reflux, caused by his cf. He also gets hayfever, which worsens his asthma. His asthma has caused him to have frequent courses of steroids.
We CHOSE to have my son, because NAIVELY, we thought that he would be as healthy as my daughter, I mean, he's got the same cf genes, so why not? And of course, we had no idea at the time, how bad cf can get, how quickly. We thought vaguely that by the time they got sick, the cure would be found, and so it wouldn't matter.
If we could go back to when we decided to try for my son, we know for a fact, that we wouldn't try for him. Once he was conceived, he was here to stay, there was no way we could have had a termination or anything, but his life has been very very difficult for him, and for us, and as a result, he's now a year behind himself, developmentally, probably caused by the amount of time he's spent very ill in his short life.
Even though he is my gorgeous little boy and I love him to pieces, having him has had a hugely negative impact on our family, Seren has struggled with coping with me and my son having long hospital stays, and as I've been suffering with depression for 2 1/2 years now, she's also had to go through that with me.
Originally, we planned a big family of 3 or 4 children, but the way things are, we just couldn't cope with any more children at all, we really really struggle to cope with the two we have.
I'm sorry to have such a negative story to tell, but I hope it helps in your decision. I personally wouldn't recommend having 2 with cf.
Becky x
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